Baby Upstairs
There’s a baby upstairs.
I live in a flat.
His dad makes fun noises.
He makes noises back.
I don’t know he’s a he,
But I know what he says:
“Dad, there’s a grumpy man burning soup downstairs.”
A Hamster in Charge
Slowly but surely,
Brick upon brick,
We’re making this poem strong,
Long, wrong and thick.
Wholly and purely,
Stick after stick,
We’ll build a nice birds nest,
For some child to kick.
Bulging and burley,
Slippery slick,
The soap on my chest,
Washes down to my ribs.
Show me a vampire
With goblets that chip.
A dinner for two of them
And one goes home sick.
Roll beneath underwire.
Be snagged by a stitch.
Then bend behind rosy brier
To wait out the hit.
Home on the side of home,
Out on that ship.
Roping and rolling crowns,
Five nickels a shift.
Serf of Sir Wave-a-tron,
Unlimited grit
Blessed is he alone:
Atlantic drift.
Down where the willows are,
Beyond the old bridge,
Caramel coffee waves
Rust on old legs.
Cantaloupe in the sky,
The rain cries to rip.
Hambone and country eyes,
Mustard on eggs.
Hollow and petrified,
Down in some crypt,
History’s hand is out,
Loosening its grip.
A rat on a spinning wheel
Runs one more trip.
Wheezing, and beady-eyed
Tripping, he flips.
In the pound where the doggies lie:
Hungrier licks.
A belly pat might arise.
She knows how to sit.
Cranberry relish flies,
Engine light switch
Fountain-like, swampy prize.
Mountainous witch.
Humble round kidney pie,
Smelly old dish.
Peas and potatoes guy
Knows he’s at risk.
Rolling and swirling white,
The price of a sniff.
I lifted my covers wide-
Unwise of my kids.
A hamster with metal ears
Was not at all slick.
But Halloween came and left
Another child tricked.
A basket was lying there.
A Whippoorwill quipped.
A handsome young flying bear
Delivered his gift.
Happy birthday to the hamster
Of mice and of men.
Here’s to the throne next year
Wherever it sits.
Rag doll and a basketball,
Two envelopes licked.
Last call for Aperol.
Next year might be it.
Diabetes at Night
I’m underneath your bed,
Waiting to be fed.
I’ve seen you sleep without your socks on.
I know your briefs are red.
I cannot get unstuck.
So, I lie here, like a rock.
I wait for you to sob at night
And then I wander off.
I meet you in your dreams.
You show me really, freaky things.
You once saw a lizard
Who couldn’t continue
To fill your penis with green ice cream.
I watch when you’re awake.
Each bite you take of chocolate cake.
I mumble for a crumb,
And hold my mitts out-
Down it comes.
Each night when you’re asleep-
I unlodge and run the street.
I went inside your car.
I found a peanut butter jar.
I stuck your keys inside,
Then locked it in the trunk and cried.
You’ve almost woken up.
Now back to my chamber I must slump.
I scramble in,
You crack your eyes,
Your feet meet the carpet I despise.
And while you wash your face
I lick your pillow,
One last taste.
And down the drain I go.
Out through the pipe to the sewer below.
The Ghost in the Radiator
The ghost in the radiator
Tells me his name
Whenever its time
For his ghostly refrain
He tickles the airwaves
With heat and with sound
Commanding the platypus
Of regional towns
I cant believe the earthquake
That comes with the snows.
The apple up on horseback.
The wrinkled snails toes.
That lamp Aladdin lives in
Makes grass from his belt.
And deviled eggs and hard lard
The best I’ve ever smelled.
What if a horse was president?
A partner in post.
A monkey on Robitussin,
A radiator in a ghost.
What if a woman called me?
With heat and with sound
To hit up the old outlet mall,
And see what's goin’ down?
What if a magic moonbeam,
Slid right down my shirt?
And went in my pocket smoothly
And let me feel alert.
How bout another credit card?
For your uncle Mike’s gift.
How bout another went too far?
A penalty, you could lift.
What doesn’t keep on going
If you give it a spin?
What knows what she is doing
When she leaves marks on your chin.
How’d he get that butter anyway?
How’d he get his own name right?
Wow he showed he made some progress…
Out naked in the orange light.